Dating after analogue

Dealing with dating after a long term relationship is no straightforward affair. As well as mourning the death of what you hoped was forever you also have the added bonus (yay, what joy…) of continued contact with the ex because you were in love (or in lust) and made a baby… or two… or three. If your ex was the reason it ended, (perhaps like mine he was a whole heap of messed up crazy) their poo poo stink can become an inconvenience that just keeps wafting over uninvited to mess up your parade. I say can because it is up to you to arm yourself with Febreeze, candles and if necessary a gas mask to protect yourself from their bad bad odours.

But that’s enough metaphor use for now.

So, valiantly, you begin to take steps to getting your groove on and showing the world that yes, damn it… I’ve got game but you are scared and all around you can see nothing but an intimidating set of obstacles.

Some of which may be:

The ex, on purpose, or just by virtue of their uselessness, is fucking up your me time
You’re feeling really insecure, perhaps after years of put downs and emotional abuse
You are scared of the place that exists out there called… single life
You feel like an OAP compared to that young thing you once were.

And then there’s the minefield that is the dating scene where…Things. Have. Changed.

Your love life now depends less on Cupid’s bow and more on the speed of your broadband, Wifi, 3G, 4G or ET phone home connection.
You may be filled with angst over whether or not to send the first message thus perhaps announcing an absolute desperation that attracts no response back or interest only from the type of psychotic manipulator you’ve only just managed to get rid of.

Well it’s all an adventure. We’ve just got to make sure the seatbelt is fastened, the brakes are working and should there be a hick up or two on the way, the airbags can be relied upon. Do your checks people. It’s gonna be one hell of a journey…

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